about the past

Yesterday Rusty asked me why I was applying for the jobs that I was applying for. I said well what else do you want me to apply for ceo? Rusty said yes. Then he brought up the past.

Lets go back several years.

What seems like a life time ago I met two ladies that had started a charity to help the military here in San Diego. I really believed in what they were doing, so I asked if I could volunteer to help them.

I volunteered for a year. The charity grew and I helped get new programs off the ground, and we were growing very fast.

I would attend dinner's and do all the formal stuff. It was great! People knew me and they knew that they could count on me. I was no longer the gunny's wife, I finally had a name and Rusty was my eye candy.

I watched this charity grow and grew to love everything about it. I loved the people I was working with, and the people I was helping.

Over time I became a paid employee. The money was good, but I can honestly say that I would do it all with out the money because I had.

I was really enjoying my job as director of services for northern San Diego.

Then one day I was asked to go over to my bosses house. I was to pick her up and take her to rehab. I so did not want to do this, but I knew it had to be done.

My bosses husband was being brought home..... he was out on ship. So the following day I went back to my bosses house and I cleaned everything up. I figured her husband would not want to come home and see her booze bottles everywhere.

While I was doing that Rusty went down to get her Husband and give him a ride home.

I got a phone call for another lady that I worked with and she asked me to bring all of my bosses paper work down to San Diego.

While I was gathering everything up I discovered that my boss was embezzling money.

I did not take the paper work to San Diego that day. I took it all home. I made dinner and got the children in bed. I walked up and turned the t.v. off and said " Rusty we need to talk".

Rusty knew something was up by the look on my face. I laid all the paper out in front of him and just started showing him everything.

Now I had to choose. Do I cover it up or do I become a whistle blower?

I chose to become a whistle blower.

Over the next few weeks the fall out from everything was more then I could handle. I was fired, called every name in the book and then they tried to come after me.

I cried the entire two weeks. Rusty finally had to take on my battle.

I lost my job, I lost people that I thought were my friends, but most of all I lost out helping people.

I swore I would never do this again.

My boss ended up getting a divorce and eventually everyone else that was involved got fired. They just wiped the slate clean and started again, and this charity is still going strong.

A year after this fall out I went into the animal shelter and volunteered to be a foster mom for kittens. This really shocked Rusty. I just explained to him that by fostering I am still doing something, but that I far enough way from everything that I will not get hurt.

Yesterday Lyn offered me a job as director for her horse and rare dog rescue. Lyn's husband is having some health issues right now and she can't give the time that is needed. I told Lyn that I would have to think about it. Rusty thinks I should go for it.

I just don't know. For me it would be so much easier just go flip burgers and not be involved and that way I won't get hurt again. I just don't know.

Here is what I do know. I know that I need to get off the computer and get busy. I need to pull something out for dinner, clean the cat boxes, and get two quilts finished! Can you believe that Lyn found the time to do two quilts. I am telling you guys this lady has more time then I do, and I do not know where she gets it.

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