good night with old friend's

Last we went over to some friends house and just chilled all night! it was so nice.How we met these people is very strange. O.K. let m see if I can explain. Matt use to work for Rusty, so thay have known each other for a long time. Then Matt meet's this gal Jen. and we all become friends. Well while Matt was In Iraq, Jen's dad got a job out here in Cali, so she brought him over to meet us. Jen's dad, Greg, use to fly with Rusty's dad!  What a small world!

So we chillded with them last night. Matt and Jen will be leaving for new york in just a few day's so it was so nice to see them. I will miss them when they leave.

Last night everyone found out what happened to Rusty and they are all scared to death. Well so am I. LOL

Gregs wife Susie is from Korea and she is just the neatest person there is. She has tought me so much about family and life. In korea they have a different system of family values and I am really starting to like them. Susie even gave me some tip's on helping Amber, So I am going to try them out this year. I like having friend that can give advice, but not be pushy about it.

Susie has her sister and her sisters boy's staying with them for the summer. The boys are the same age as our children, so they are going to come over on Tuesday and just hang out. The boys speak very good english! I was shocked at first, but then I learned that english is tought in the schools over there. I think it will be good for the children to be around another culture.

 

today I think that I might do a little more sewing. Susie's sister was showing me some clothes that she made, so I think I am going to give it a try! Other then that and cleaning I am going to do nothing. It is nice to be able to spend the day hanging with my family.

Oh! I made a duck and a penguin pillow a while ago. Well our friend Jason snagged the penguin pillow and last night when I talked to his girlfriend she said that he was cuddling with it! Boy's never really grow up! So she was thrilled when I told her about the lanket I made for him. Jason said that he wants a rode with penguins on it! What am I? So I told him that I would make him one, but that he would have to try it on with now clothes on! Jason has a body to die for!

With that said I am going to take off and start by day.

good day

Well Rusty is out the door! I am so glad to see him back to "normal". Our normal has changed, and that is fine. Normal for us now is Rusty walking with a cane, and moving a little slower. Normal is Rusty not being able to work to hard or anything that will get his heart racing. That is cool, because I learned real quick to slow down. But when you love someone those are just little changes.

I am going to get in the shower and actuall get dressed today. The last couple of day's I have just thrown on what ever fell out of the closet! LOL

One of our friends just found out about Rusty so he will be coming up this afternoon to see Rusty. Jason is so awesome. I could not have asked for a better friend for Rusty. Jason and Rusty both went into Iraq and I knew that Jason would watch Rusty's back. Actually I am not sure what part of Rusty Jason watched. Jason is a gunner so he sat on top of the hummer that rusty drove and just shot anything that moved. The man is crazy, so he fits in good here.

I am glad that the fridge and freezer are full. bcause I know Jason and I know that he is going to check these things. If he felt that there was not enough food in the house, then he would be out buying more for us.

Jason is the one that I am making the quilt for. It will be nothing fancy because the material I picked out would look bad if I cut it up into squars.... anyway I know he will like it.

I am off to start an awesome day.

great day

Well, I got a lot done today. In the morning Rusty will be back to his usual running around. I am looking foward to seeing him getting back to life.

I am going to spend the rest of the night doing nothing. Wait I have a quilt to make, so maybe I will get started on it.

Who knows, the night is young.

be still

Last night Rusty and I went out to dinner, Then I came home and took a bath. As i was getting ready for bed I suddenly remembered what a dear friend use to say to me when I was stressed. " Be still and know that I am God". WOW that hit me like a ton of bricks. I need to be still and know that I can not controll everything that happens. I slept with a new calm last night.

Now I am up and ready to get back on track. I started the laundry and to clean up the house. Today I am looking foward to cleaning and just spending time with my family. The yard will not get tilled today, and that is fine with me. I have a new perspective, and that is that some things can wait.

Well our company just left. I can't say that I am sad about that.

Right now life is good, so I am going to savor the day.

I made it

Well the day is coming to an end and some how I am still standing. I did everything that I needed to do. My eyes ares ore from crying and I so worn out. But I am still standing.

This morning I called my friend Ray. Now Ray and I have a love hate relationship, so when he answered the phone he barked at me! I amsked him if he could talk and he so no, that he would have to call me back. So about five min. later he called back, and I just lost it. Through my sobs I heard Ray the marine start barking orders. " you get in and answer my phone, if anyone calls take a message. You get in here and guard the hatch, if anyone shows up tell them to hang tight, and dont bother me until I come back in" Then I told him what happened. Ray let me have a pitty party and then told me that God knew I could handle the stress and that is why this was put on us. Well maybe God should not trust me so much.... lol

I really believe that a friend is someone who walks in when the rest of the world walks out, well last night the chips were down for us and today I found out who our true friend were. Ray was one of them. Can you believe that he actually offered to take leave and come get all of my children if rusty ever goes into the hospital! He has three small children of his own and lives in a single wide trailer. I call a guy that we are in bis. with and asked him to step in and run our bis. today. He was right there! He did awesome. He not only ran our bis, but he was actuall concerned about us. What a friend. The people that are staying with however .... well I am glad that I did not give the title of friend out to them! They were here last night when everything happened, so they knew that I was under a lot of stress. They got up this morning and went to the beach. They did not offer to take the girls, they did not aask if we needed anything.... NOTHING. oh well I can now see the kind of people that they are.

I am very scared and yet very hopeful. I am scared that I am going to loose Rusty, yet hopeful that since we caught this problem early it wont be a problem in the future. Hope is what keeps me going.

I called my mom today and told her what happened. My mom explained all the medical stuff to me, since doctors talk in their own language! mom informed me that me dad is doing worse and at the end of the month he has to hav a scope stuck into his lungs to find out what is wrong with them. I do not know what I will do if my dad dies. He is my best friend and I will never recover from loosing him.

OH! last night at the hospital our doctor use to be Balboa! Then our nurse was a corpsmen!  I asked this guy if he liked serving with the navy or the marines better, and he said the marines! So I made the joke that I could yll corpsman up and the doc and the corp men would know what I meant. We just cant get away from the marines!

I made it, so I dont want to hear other people complaining!

my day got worse

Last night was.....Rusty,Amber and I started yelling at each other. Amber went to bed, then I went to bed. Rusty walked into the bedroom and asked me if I was still awake. I said yes as mean as I could. Then Rusty said I think I am having a heart attack.

He was and he did. It was small enough that they snt him home, but he has to go in very soon and get a stress test done.

I have so much to do today and I am not even sure where to start. I guess I really do need to take today just one step at a time. Step one.. I dont even know. I dont know where to start. I made a lot of phone calls already. I need to go get some ins. papers. I need to get dressed, I dont know. I am so lost right now. I dont even know if I have someone to lean on. I have no shoulder to cry on, so I guess I better stop having a pitty party and just do what has to be done.

Another day

Well today has been full of ups and downs. Amber is pissed at us and is giving us the silent treatment. We went out and bought locks for all the windows and alarms for all the doors. Life must suck being 15.

I must have called everyone looking for a tiller today. I found two of them but we cant get a hold of them. That would figure. I want to get work done around here and I dont have the tools to get it done. I did however find a place that sells sod real cheap so I am just going to sod that section of the yard. Once we start on the back yard we are going to sod it too. I like sod! LOL

W got two amazing phone calls today. One from our friend Julie who wants us to show someone how to do our biz. Another guy that just got in is bringing someone new over Thursday who wans to get in.  cha ching.

I need to get in the shower and I think I am going to chill the rest of the night.