Monday, February 26, 2007

choices

I just got an email from my mom and she wants the children to come out in July. Fine whatever. I said that I would not keep the children from their grandmother, and she did offer to pay for half of the tickets.

With that said. I told Amber that she needs to do some thinking.

1. If she goes to Chicago will her job there when she gets back.

2. She must still pay her phone bill every month..... even if she is on vacation.

3. She still has to raise $250 a month to go for her trip to Europe.

4. She will be driving by then and she will have to start paying for her own insurance. We are thinking it is going to be about $75 a month.

So now Amber has some choices to make, and Amber is asking me some questions that I can't and/or should not have to answer. Some of her questions are:

1. Why is it that when we go to visit gran that we have to be around Kailey (niece from hell) all the time.

2. Gran spends everyday with Kailey, so why can't she come out here for a visit.

3. Why is it that when we do go out for a visit that we can't spend any alone time with Gran because Kailey is always there.

4. Why is it that if we want to something but kailey does not then we don't do it?

I COULD answer these questions but I don't think my truthful answers would help. What am I suppose to say? "Well Amber you grandmother chose Kailey over every other grandchild. I do not know why, but she did. Even if the rest of the family is hurting or in need she can't be bothered because Kailey will always come first." I KNOW that comment would not get me any where and I KNOW that negative statement will only run down the image that my children have of their grandmother.

I do feel for Amber because she sees everything that goes on and she knows that she will always come after Kailey and yet she is chasing the love of a grandparent. Amber is chasing a love that I know does not exist.

Here are the choices that I left Amber with:

1. save every penny that you make so that your bills will be covered for July.

2. Don't go.

I also told Amber that I WILL HELP her chase her dreams, but I am not going to do all the work.

So we will see I guess. growing up sucks sometimes.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

yup growing up sucks. So sorry your girls have to have those kinds of issues to deal with.
love the graffic at the bottom.
Barbara

Anonymous said...

Kelli, that sucks that Amber's grandma plays favorites with Kailey, wow my grandparents played favorites with my cousins and it was very hurtful, Hugs to Amber and you  too Lisa

Anonymous said...

You are very wise to make her pay her own way.
Does Kailey live with gramma?
Marti

Anonymous said...

amber has a lot to think about for sure. I wish her luck with whatever she decides to do.

Anonymous said...

((((((((((((((((((((HUGSTOYOU))))))))))))))))))))It seems as Amber does have alot of thinking to do,what ever She choses,will be the best one.You are a good Mom and all of thoes choices are good.I hoe and pray everything will work out.I do know how it feels visiting Grandma when,grandma has there favorites.Have a nice day.

Anonymous said...

Kids are smart.  They'll see the truth of what is going on, and you can only just be there for them when they feel the effects of it.
Lori
http://journals.aol.com/helmswondermom/DustyPages

Anonymous said...

Yeah Kelli... every family has what they call"detractors"
Sorry about that!
Good luck my good friend
hugs,nat
ps as her mom you can't insist that she finish raising her money for the trip and rap up her job?
If not can you ask your mom to disinclude the neice jsut for this time period/
love,nat