Monday, April 30, 2007

planting is done

I have gotten all of my planting done! I so hope that the pumpkins do well. Last year the pumpkins were so darn expensive, and that is why I was hoping to grow some this year.

The first year we lived in this house I planted sun flowers and they were so big and beautiful. Last summer I did not plant any. people from the neighbor hood would upset with me. Now keep in mind, I only know three people in our neighbor hood. But if people saw me out in the yard they would stop and ask what happened to the sunflower. So they can't complain this year.

Oh some of my rose bushes are blooming! I am so happy about that.

I just got off the phone with tour group that Amber is going with. I asked them if they would please send us a payment book. The lady said that they do not do that. They send out a coupon for the first payment and then after that we will get a another bill for the remaining balance which is due next march. What? I was so hoping to teach Amber about paying a monthly bill and keeping track of everything. I will need to re group and think about how we are going to do this. Amber still has her chart on the wall to help her keep track,...... they just can't make it easy on us can they?

Last week Jake had requested a dish called cheesy chicken. I was so not in the mood to cook, so I made Jake make it! I sat my lazy butt on the bar stool and walked him through it. Jake even made rice crispy treats!

Chris went to do some errands with me yesterday. One of the stops was joann fabrics. While I was looking for trim for Dustins quilt, Chris started picking out material for his! These guys are such big babies.

I still have a few things to do before the children get home from school, so I am off to hopefully get some stuff done.

Note to self: never expect anything to be to easy.


the clouds are here

Well I got up this morning with a list of things that I wanted to do outside. Dang if the sky isn't covered in clouds! I am just hoping that they burn off soon.

Anyway, we have been having some issues with Nikki not being able to be home by the time we tell her. Last night she pulled another stunt. So that is the end of her social life for a while. I am not to worried about the whole thing, because I know that she is just pushing to see how far she can go, but I am standing firm.

I spoke to my mother the other day and she asked me if Nikki could stay for the whole month when the children go out. I told her that I would think about it, but the answer will be no. My mom said that she will be working, so Nikki would either be by herself or she would have to go to my sisters house. Well I do not like the idea of Nikki being home alone for 10 hours a day. I also know that if she is at my sisters that hell child will get to Nikki.

Rusty and I discussed some future plans. Amber will be living here while she is in college. Nikki most likely will too, but we are not sure if she is going to go live with some missionaries for a year first. Then Ryan came up. I mentioned that we should start looking at some group homes. Rusty said that he is not sure if Ryan would do well in a group home because the other children ( adults by then) will pick on him. I tried to explain that all of the people would be just like him.  This is a very hard subject in our house.

Amber came into our bedroom this morning to tell me that her toothbrush has grown legs and walked away. So I was digging through all of the drawers in the bathroom trying to find a damn toothbrush! I finally found one, but not before I some amazing crap that had just been shoved ina drawer. So first thing this morning I cleaned out my medicine cabinet. I cant believe how much junk you can shove into a medicine cabinet! I am going to go clean out the rest of the drawers, It is time to do another spring cleaning.

Neffi has been hiding in the garage for two days now. I thought about putting some food out there for her, but I did not. I know that she will settle down and when she gets hungry enough she will come and eat.

I need to go grind up the meat for the chili and start my day. I am not going to let these darn clouds stop me!

Neffi just came out!


Sunday, April 29, 2007

moving on

Well I am still hurt this morning. Amber and Rusty really hurt me, but that is in the past, so it is time to move on.

I was going to go do some running around tomorrow but I went today instead. I even sent Rusty and Jake to lowes. So I should have everything I need for the week! I will be nice to not have to go to many places.

Oh! I was at sprouts ( its an organic market) today and I found this lipstick that I really like. I am so amazed at how far organic make up has come. I did try to share my excitement with Rusty but he could not be bothered. He said that he just does not care about what type of lip stick I buy. I had to laugh, because I know that he was laughing at me.

Anyway, I bought some trim and batting for a quilt that I need to finish. And yes I will take pictures of it. The guys are suppose to be buying me some pumpkin seed and strawberry plants. So I am hoping to get them in the ground this week. The guys are also suppose to be buying me the stuff to finish this desk that I have been trying to restore for ever.

So as you can see I am hoping to fill my week with productive stuff.

Anyway, Jake put in a special request for dinner tonight, so I need to get busy and get it done.

Oh for anyone who read the comments, yes my husband left me a comment using my screen name!


Saturday, April 28, 2007

alone and disappointed

Well my day started at 5 a.m. this morning. Both of the girls had their yard sale, the boys played golf, and I am just worn out.

Amber had a good yard sale but the lady that said she was going to put up the signs never did, so I think she could have done better. Oh well that is life.

Amber had prom tonight. Amber has really hurt and disappointed me. I guess I should explain.

I never went to prom. I was the fat and ugly girl in school. Anyway, I wanted to do all of the prom stuff with Amber. I wanted to help her pick out her dress. I was not even asked to go. I wanted to help her do her hair. Amber wanted to pay someone to do it. I wanted to help her put on her make up. Amber asked this gal Lisa to do her make up. I guess I should be happy that I was allowed to put Ambers necklace on.

I know this sounds stupid, but I want to be there for every part of Ambers big night, and I was not any part of it.

Lisa saw me crying and said "If I had a daughter I would feel the same way"

I just looked at her and said " you have no idea why I am crying." and I just walked away.

Lisa came up behind me and asked me if I wanted to talk about it. I just told her no. I figured making her feel bad would not help the situation at all.

Tonight I hope that Ambers hair goes flat, and that she is so hot that all of her make up runs off. I hope that she eats before pictures and then looks fat for her pictures. I hope that she breaks a heal and gets a flat tire.

Everyone left to go get some dinner. I am glad to be alone.

Here are some things that I have learned today:

1. Go put up your own yard sale signs

2. never expect to much from your children.

3. no matter how loud you turn the music up, your sorrows will still be there.

4. no matter how much you do for your children, they will never care.

O.K. now I need to list some positive things.

1. I found some hippy clothes

2. I have a full bottle wine that is calling my name

3. I have a husband who does care about me

Friday, April 27, 2007

I am still in my happy place

So this morning I called a friend ( yes I do have friends...that do not live in my computer) Anyway after I got off the phone with her I took the trash out.

That was when I discovered that it was a beautiful out. I came back in side, put on my swim suit and grabbed my hippy hat, and headed out the door. I stopped and grabbed some lunch and a magazine at sat by the lake for a few hours.

Man I so need that. I ate my lunch and read and took a nap! It so recharged my batteries. I forgot what it was like to have my batteries charged, and to clear my mind. I so need that time alone.

Then I got home and found out that I two messages from people and they needed me to pick up their yard sale left overs. I got to the first place o.k. I came home and took a nap. I needed to wait on Amber to get home so that I could run her to work.

I go to take Amber to work and then I am off to get some more stuff. That is when I got pulled over. Thats right the police pulled little ol me over.

I ended up with three fine. 1 for not having my driver lis. on me 2. was for not having my insurance card on my. Number 3 was for not have the correct plates on the car!

Thats right someone put the wrong plates on my car. I am going to blame Jake for that one. But at least I just got fined and nothing else.

I am so glad that I took the time to recharge my batteries before this afternoon happened.

Tomorrow is going to be very busy. both of the girls have their yard sale. Then I have to go pick up Sams flowers. Then Amber has to go cash her check, go get some nylons, and go get her hair done. Then their is prom tomorrow night. At some point I told Amber that I would let her take a nap, and that I would work her yard sale for her.

The guys will be no help to me since they will be golfing tomorrow. However I told them that they had to be home by 3:30 so that they can watch Amber go off to her first prom.

Good night everyone.

welcome Queen Nefertiti

Well yesterday I rescued another cat. I named her queen Nefertiti. I figured I would keep with the queen theme. So we are calling her Neffi. Neffi just got done nursing a litter of kittens and she is so very skinny! Yesterday Neffi did nothing but eat. Poor girl. Once she puts some weight on I am going to take her in and get her fixed. Read my side bar and you will know why.

Anyway Neffi is doing fine with the other cats and with Rascle, but she does not like Butter. Life moves on.

Well yesterday I got the back room cleaned up and Amber helped me. Since Jake sleeps back there on the weekends I guess you could say that we cleaned his room. Either way it needed to be done.

I finally went through all of my boxes of material and have condensed them down to four small crates total, and they are now neatly stored on shelves out in the garage.

Now on to Rusty's stuff. He has about six large crates that he really needs to go through. I do not want to hassle him, but at some point he is going to have to go through them. All of the crates came from his moms house so I think he is just hoping that he will not have to go through them.

I did get up the courage yesterday to go through the one box of my dads stuff. I threw most of it away. I kept a book that I bought for him and I am going to ask Rusty to put it in the safe for me. I guess time is healing me a little bit. It has not been a year since my dad has passed away, but I was able to go through that box and just pitch a lot of it.

Today I am going to put three small pork roast in the crock pot. One I am going to slice open and stuff it with apples and a little bit of brown sugar. The other two I am cooking up, so that I can pull them apart and cover it bbq sauce. BBQ pork sandwiches sound really good right now, but I will save that for a busy day dinner.

Amber is going to have a busy day tomorrow. She has the yard sale and then she has to go get her hair done, and get ready for prom. I did tell Amber that I would work most of the yard sale for her so that she can go take a nap. I can't wait to see Amber all dressed up!

Here is a tip for you. If you are going to try to play music on your computer.... make sure your speakers are on! Yes I just sat here and tried to figured out why I could not hear the music!

O.K. it is time to go get dressed and to get dinner started.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

here I sit


Oh look it is my breakfast! O.K. so I am drinking my first cup of coffee and I am starting to get moving.

Today I just have a lot of phone calls to make, and I am going to attempt to clean up the house a little bit more. Why am I even bothering to try to keep up with the house is beyond me. Lets face it cleaning the house while their are still children in it is like shoveling while it is still snowing.

Enough about that. One of the ladies on the other street made a very nice gesture for the girls. This lady is a realtor and she is hosting a neighborhood yard sale this weekend. So I e mailed her and I told her that we wanted to be involved. After we talked for a while, she offered to let us use her yard sale signs any time, and she is going to collect everyone else's left overs and give them to us! I think I might like this lady. Oh wait I forgot I am a house rat so the chances of us meeting are slim to none.....unless she comes over here.

I went grocery shopping yesterday, but I am not sure why. Now my family is going to demand that I cook for them. Oh I guess that is just part of my life.

Yesterday I called a friend that I had not heard from in a while. Yes, I do have a few friends. Anyway I called to ask her a question and the baby was just screaming in the back ground. It turns out that this poor little girl has been sick for over a month. Poor baby. So on my way out to the store I stopped and bought her a happy meal and took it over. A happy meal will make any two year old a little happier. I also took so of my pet quilts over, because my friend works at vets office, and she said that they love them.

Yesterday Nikki's mission trip leader asked us if we would go pick up some stuff for the yard sale this weekend. So I map quested the direction and Sam and I took off to go pick the stuff. Well that was all fine until we figured out that map quest was wrong! Oh the joys. We finally get there and he had a lot of nice stuff.We got that stuff loaded and we decided to try and follow the map quest directions home. Well map took us down another dead end street. But this dead end street had a bunch of free stuff on it. So we load it up. I swear we looked worse then the Beverly hillbilly. Sam said that he would chase the bob cat instead of ever using map quest direction. Well Sam better get busy and go get my cat!

Amber looks so cute. She just made French toast for Sam. The sad part is, Amber had never made French toast before. If Sam drops dead we all know why.

O.K. I got on some music and now maybe I can get moving. On my list of things to do is clean the kitchen, sort through boxes of material, sweep and mop the house. I think I should be able to get that stuff done.


Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Rusty is not laughing.

O.K. back to the bob cat issue. Rusty saw no humor in the fact that I made Amber chase a domesticated bob cat. When I asked him why he was not laughing, he asked me how I knew it was a domesticated bob cat and not a bob cat kitten that came down form the mountains?

Hmmm, I never really thought about it that way. However that did get me to thinking. Can I have a bob cat as a pet? Let's call Jake he will tell me.

So I call Jake. Jake is from Oregon and is family into hunting and trapping, I grew up in the city, so I called the expert.

Jake: hey momma what is going on?

Me: I want a bob cat

Jake: well I will get right on that.

Me: I had Amber chase down what I thought was a domesticated bob cat but she could not catch it. Rusty thinks it might have been a real bob cat kitten since they have been coming down out of the mountains. I want a bob cat.

Jake: Well if it was a real bob cat kitten then momma could have been hanging around.

Me: I want a bob cat.

Jake: then go get a trap, put a can of food in it and make sure you wear gloves when you take the trap out to set it up. You can domesticate a bob cat if you get it de clawed and spend a lot of time with it.

Me:  Well we do have vets here and lets face it I am a house rat, so spending time with it would not be a problem. Can't you just bring me one back? I have a cat carrier.

Jake: I will see what I can do.

Now Rusty is laying next me and just wishing that Jake would shut up. I however am happy that I now know how to trap a bob cat.

I went to take a bath and Nikki came in and asked me if Jake was going to get me a bob cat. Oh yes my children do not care what I am doing, they will talk to me at anytime.

Nikki: well if Jake gets us a bob cat we can get a big collar and walk it like we walk the dogs.

Me: that would be so cool! Can you imagine someone coming to the door and seeing Rascle, Butter and a bobcat sitting there. Hell no one will ever try to break into this house!

Nikki: Hey we can name it Bob the Cat. It would be so funny to have people come in and then Bob the Cat comes walking along.

Me: man that would be so funny.

Nikki: you know we would have to get something for Butter. After all he is scared of the a 3 pound cat.

Me: oh that's right. Well I am sure that make something for dogs that have anxiety.

Nikki: Oh you so need to get a bob cat.

I get out of the tub and Rusty still is not laughing. He does swear that we have lost our minds.

Anyway onto another subject. I swear some children are so lazy! Nikki and I went by the church to pick up some more phone books. It seems that some of the children that are going on the mission trip do not want to raise the funds. One girl said why should I work for it when my dad will pay for it all!

Then there is Anthony. His family does not have the money to pay for his trip so he working his tail off to try to raise the money. Anthony stopped by the church and picked up 30 boxes of phone books!

So Yesterday as we were passing out some of Nikki's phone books she said that she was not going to go get any more to pass out, because Anthony needs the money, and Nikki has gotten some sponsors. So I asked Nikki why she was not helping Anthony raise the money.

Nikki called Anthony last night and told him that she Monday afternoon and Monday evening free and that she would help him go pass out phone books and that he could keep all of the money.

Nikki well both of the girls are such caring people. I know that Nikki will be rewarded for doing the right thing.

Anyway I need top go get into the shower, and go do some shopping. My family wants to eat tonight.


Tuesday, April 24, 2007

why not?


O.K. So I am running Amber around to get all of her prom stuff done. When there in front of us is a domesticated bob cat crossing the road. I made Amber get out of the car and chase the cat down. I so have wanted one of those cats for such a long time. Well it was kinda funny watching Amber run around the street trying to catch this cat.

Amber got a red necklace and matching earrings, and then she even got some red gloves. Amber is going to look so hot!

I want to give a BIG thank you to Lyn. You are so awesome.

O.K. I am off and running to take Nikki to do her stuff.


jamin out to Gretchen Wilson

I so like Gretchen Wilson! Yes I am red neck, white trash momma!

I figure if I turn up the music it will get me in the mood to start my day. So far it is not working.

So last night I told the girls to put Dustins car kit in the back of Rusty's truck. I wanted this big ass box out of the hall way! So Rusty calls me this morning to tell me that the box blew apart while he was driving down the freeway. I just busted out laughing! Rusty did not see the humor in it. He said that he just got it all out of the freeway. I told him that he should have left it after all that is what cal trans gets paid for. Rusty was so not happy with that answer.

I want to say a very big welcome to Mary Beth. Mary Beth is Chris mom.... on of the marines. Anyway I told her to grab a cup and sit down, well it took her three cups! I can't wait for Mary Beth to come out. I know that we are going to have such a great time. So welcome Mary Beth, stop by often and have a good laugh with us.

Today I think I am going to clean using trash bags. The house has just gotten away from me, so I am thinking that I should just throw a bunch of stuff out. Rusty say's that if I keep cleaning like that, that we will have nothing left in the house. I think it will be less for me to keep up with.

Today I have to take Amber to get all of her prom jewelry. Then after I am done with that Nikki needs to return her shoes and get a smaller size and she has a pac sun gift card to spend. I am telling you these girls can run me ragged most days.

Our friend Elle called us last night to tell us that she has joined the Marine reserves. Her "job" is being recalled so she went ahead and joined the reserves in hope that she will not get deployed again. Do not get us wrong, Elle would go back in a heart beat if her country asked her to, But she is waiting on her boyfriend to get home from Iraq. All I can say is Semper Fi, and thank you.

Oh Rusty's song just came on! LOL I am as good once as I ever was by Toby Keith. I must laugh because as you get older and gravity takes over the sex is not the same same...... It is so much better.

Enough about that. I need to go kick the dogs off the sofa and clean up the living room. I suggested to Rusty that we get rid of all the furniture and buy some of those giant bean bags. I figured they would be easier to move, so I could really get into the living room and clean. Then we could push them together and make some beds. Rusty did not like that idea.

We are definitely ying and yang.


Monday, April 23, 2007

What a morning.

Oh my gosh I could not make this up! Last night and today have been crazy.

Last night I took Jake back to base. I got home about 10 p.m. and so worn out. I offered to take Jake to base so that Rusty could get some sleep since he had to work this morning. Anyway I got home and Rusty was still awake. I told him tha I was going to go take a shower and then come to bed.

I got out of the shower and rusty said " Kelli don't get dressed I want to cuddle and just feel your body next to mine." So I went and cuddle with him until he fell asleep.

This morning I got up and found nikki sleeping on the sofa. I felt her head and she felt fine so I asked her what was wrong and she said that she just did not feel well, and daddy told her to stay home.

That does not shock me. Nikki goes a million miles a minute and now here body is trying to play catch up on sleep.

I figured that I would let her sleep and I started cleaning in the back of the house. I got our bathroom  and bedroom cleaned. Then I went and gathered up all of the rugs. I gave them a gentle shake and they left little piles of dirt on the floor.

Then my cell phone rings and it is my former mother in law. We actually had a very civil conversation. She wanted to tank me for sending out the flowers and for me allowing her to talk to Nikki yesterday. I asked her how she was doing and I was shocked at what she told me.

It seems that my ex and my former mother in laws in laws are trying to take everything from her and leave with nothing but the bills. Former mil said that she has spoken with her lawyer and since their divorce was not final that all of the property and everything else goes to her asthe surviving spouse.

I was not to shocked by this. I have known for way to long that my ex was a rat and this just proves it. Anyway I had to tell Rusty about this, so I called him. Rusty said " baby I do not have time to talk I just got slammed with a big shipment" I asked him if he wanted me to come down, and he said yes.

I called our friend Kevin and asked him to help, so he was there long before I showed up. So Nikki and I helped out where we could. We went and got everyone lunch and then I made some deliveries for Rusty.

So now I am back home and just worn out. I have no meat in the freezer since I have not gone grocery shopping yet. I still have those little piles of dirt that need to be cleaned up.

I need to stop and think. Nikki is resting again. I did get the fans in the window so that we could air the house out. Amber is out with Sam. I can get some of the piles cleaned up and part of the floor mopped before they come home. Then Amber wants to go look at jewelry for prom.

I am going to have to take this evening one thing at a time. Sorry if I do not get to everyone's journal.

Sunday, April 22, 2007

Happy Birthday


Today my baby girl is 15. It is so hard for me to believe. Last night I stayed up to wish her a happy birthday. Nikki was born at one second after midnight!

Nikki was a very sick baby and cried all the time. One night while I was walking the floor I turned on the c.d. player and my mom had Patsy Cline in. Nikki went right to sleep! From then on out we plated Patsy Cline when we wanted Nikki to go to sleep....sometimes it helped. I however just cringe overtime I hear Patsy Cline!

Nikki was a very small child and that comes from her being sick all of the time. Nikki was a whole 18 pounds at 2. I remember the day that the doctor looked at me and said that there nothing else they could do for Nikki and suggest that I take her to a "healer".

That was my first time I used alternative medicine. It worked and Nikki is doing great.

I am starting to go through typical teenage stuff with Nikki, but I am going to stop it before it goes to far. I guess that is part of growing up.

Nikki and her friend Brenna and the rest of the gang are out racing cars. As usual I am stuck here with Ryan. I am sitting here waiting on everyone else to get home.

I have not seen Nikki much today. It does break my heart because I would have loved to spend the whole day with her. However I do know that for her that friends are more important.

I could scream that life is not fair, but it would not do any good. So I am going to list three positive things and then I am going to get started on some house work.

1. Nikki has the courage to chase her dreams

2. Nikki can light up a room when she walks into it

3.Nikki has a sense of style that no one can match.




"Military friendships come and go; the military is a fertile breeding ground for fleeting relationships"

I was flipping through the Marine Corps times this weekend and I saw an article about friends and the military, and I just loved that quote.

It is so true. Many times I have made friends and many times they have fizzled out after one of us left.

I am at a point in my life where we are very stable and we will not be moving anytime soon. Now our friends come up here and hang out.

However, when you have friends that are in the military you will always know that someday they will leave. That does not stop my heart from loving them. I go on. Every time I see them I smile and welcome them home.

One day, I know these young men and women will leave and go to new duty stations or get out of the service and go on to bigger and better things. I never like to see them leave. I never want to say good bye, but I know that it is part of life.

I do know that I am a better person because I have met these people. And I know that each one of them has shaped me and is making me into a bigger and better person.

I do not know why I was chosen to be the safe house for all the marines, but I do know that this job is a doubled edge sword. For whatever reason unknown to me I am here, and I know this what I am suppose to be doing. I also know that someday every will come back to me. It may be at my funeral, but I would be so honored to be surrounded by the marines that I have loved.

I was told today that Rusty and I are rich. I told this young man that were not rich, but we are doing what we love, and what we are doing the right thing. My pantry is never empty, and the bills are paid. I know that we never run out of anything because the more you give the more you will get back.

I just know that I am the luckiest women in the world,And for that I will forever be grateful.

Saturday, April 21, 2007

busy bust day


I have not stopped running all day long. Nikki had to go pass out phone books as part of her fund raiser. Then Amber had to go pick up some stuff for her yard sale.

Dustin borrowed the car and before I could tell him that the gas gage did not work and that he would need to put gas in the car.... he was out the door. Dustin ran out of gas. We had to send someone to take him gas.

Nikki and I got into a battle of wills tonight and she lost.

I am going to stay up for a little bit longer so that I can wish her a happy birthday. Nikki was born one second after mid night!

Tomorrow we are going to take Nikki to go race go carts. I bought Nikki and mp3 player and a sun dress. Amber got her a charm bracelet and Ryan is getting her a new pair of shoe. Nikki wants brownies instead of cake, so I will make her up some brownies in the morning.

Good night everyone.

Friday, April 20, 2007

trying to stay positive


Well it is actually raining here! I am not happy this time because now Amber is very discouraged.

We got up early and got everything set up and we were watching the clouds roll by, so I said  well it looks like the storm will blow over. Oh no I was wrong!

I am trying to stay positive, by saying things like, well you did make $30 even with the rain and that is more then you had when you woke up this morning. It is so did not making her feel any better. Then I said well we can put everything back and gather some more stuff for an even bigger yard sale next Saturday. That did not make her feel any better either. Well I have tried.

A lady came to the yard sale today and asked me if we still had the old sewing machine from our last yard sale. I told her no, but that I did have one in the house that I was thinking about selling. I brought her in and she looked at my old pump sewing machine. She asked me how much I wanted for it and I told her $100. She then offered me $80. I took it. That will give me some extra money for Nikki's birthday and to go buy Amber a nice necklace and some earing for prom. SHHH do not tell Rusty or the children what I have done. Rusty will say but Kelli you wanted that machine for so long. Yes that is true, but it is just material possesion, and they would just sell it when I die anyway.

Well I just got a good laugh. The two black cats were getting a drink of water. The baby splashed Miss Cleo so Miss Cleo hit him back and she ended up pushing the babies face into the water! I swear I should have a video camera set up and charge people to watch us!

I think I am going to go buy Amber some lunch. Maybe that will make her feel a little better.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

being the bigger person

Well, here is a picture of the flowers that I sent out for the girls grandfather.I must say that doing the right thing is not easy.

Yesterday my former mother in law made a few uncalled for comments, but I just let them go. I knew that she was hurting and I did not want to add fuel to the fire.

Today I spoke with my former mother in again. I got the name and addy of the church, so that I could send out the flowers. I also asked her to please send each of the girls a copy of whatever the funeral home puts out. She said that she would also get a newspaper clipping for the girl's. Today's conversation was much nicer.

I keep asking myself why I am being so nice and why do I even care. I guess I am trying to do the right thing, with out exposing the children to their sperm donor. I am trying to be a better person.

I do hope that one day when the girls are older that they will look back and learn a lesson from me. I want them to learn that they can still be kind and care with out opening themselves up to more pain and hurt. I want them to know that doing the right thing is not easy, but it is the right thing.

I know that I am continuing to grow up. I know this because if this had happened years ago I would have not been so nice. I would not have even told the girls or cared. The moment I decided to put away all of the anger is the moment that I grew up just a little bit more.

Rusty tells me all the time that I am a better person then he is. I do not think that I better I just know that we are different. We are different in the ways that we deal with things that matter.

So the flowers have been sent and I will mail some cards out this afternoon. Now I need to focus on my family and what still needs to be done here. Tomorrow is Ambers first yard sale day, so I am going to try to help her get some stuff done today.


Wednesday, April 18, 2007

life moves on

Well after my rude wake up call, I still had to get some stuff done around here.

There are some pictures of my dining room table. It was driving me crazy to see all of the clutter on it! I have been busy the last few day's so everything just got piled up on the table. My goal for today was to get the tabled cleaned off and cleaned! I did finally get that done. It looks so much better.

I had to go back to wal mart today because no one bothered to tell me that we were running low on dog food. I discovered this last night when I went to feed them. I got Rascle some weight control food because she is starting to gain some weight and I got butter some high calorie food because he looks skinny!

While at wal mart I saw this really cute dress that I bought for Nikki's birthday. Then I went and got a sympathy card for the girls to send to their grandmother. It just felt so wrong for me to being for a happy and sad occasion all at the same time! Oh well life does move on.

I am not sure what I have planned for tonight. I told Rusty that I would cook dinner but then I forgot to buy the stuff that I needed. So I guess I need to go to the store. I am thinking about making turkey tacos for dinner. That would be quick and easy.

Oh I bought this stuff that is suppose to help cat's cough up hair balls. I know that sounds gross, but Miss Cleo has been trying to hack one up for a while, so I thought I would give it a try.

Sam called me today. ( Ambers boyfriend) He wanted to know what I was doing. and I was like...well not much. He said good I had a half day so I am going to come hang out with you. O.K. I am beginning to think that we can claim Sam on our taxes!

I  need to go get the stuff to finish dinner.

bad news for the girls

I just got a phone call from my former mother in law. My former father in law passed away last night of a massive heart attack.

I do feel bad. I have nothing against the girls grandparents, but I just do not know what to say to the girls. I will have to tell them when they get home from school.

I did tell my former mother in law that I would NOT be sending the children out there, I am however going to send some flowers to the funeral home.

I have a lot to do today, and this afternoon I will have to break the news to the girls.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Big Babies

So they other night I was laying in bed and I rolled over and looked at Rusty and said " you know I never wanted boy's, so how come a house full of them?"

Rusty said "Well do you want me to tell them to leave?"

How did my life get filled with guy's. One day a was a just a housewife and a mom to three children and the next day my house is packed with big boy's.

One day it was one of the marines birthdays, and we did not have a lot of extra money so I sewed HER a blanket for her birthday. Then CJ and Jake started to pout and asked where theirs were. So I made them blankets.

Then Kevin, CJ,Jake and Beth leave for Iraq and they have their blankets in tow. They looked so cute. Big bad marines with loaded weapons marching off to war and carrying their blankets!

While everyone was in Iraq I made two more blankets for two marines over there.

Then everyone comes home and we meet some new marines. I got manny's blanket done and I need to work on a blanket for Dustin and Chris.

Man I am tired just trying to explain all of this!

Anyway, CJ and I were talking one night and he said to me " We were out on patrol and we was going to get a few hours for sleep before we had to start to move again. I grabbed the blanket and wrapped it. It was strange, but I could smell home, and it took me back to a time when we would bbq and laugh around the fire."

That made me cry.

Last weekend Jake and Chris were in the kitchen and was standing by the breakfast bar. Jake something about being a marine and I said " Oh that's right you are a big tuff marine that takes his blanket off to war".

Jake just looked at me and smiled and said "damn right I do and I was warm"

Chris said "wait a minute you made Jake a blanket?"

Jake said " no she makes everyone blankets"

Chris then looks at me and says " well where is my blanket"

OH my gosh! They were like children comparing new toys. I told Chris that I would make him one.

I went to bed that night and I told Rusty "I am glad that I have a house full of boy's and I am glad that they love me. I am glad that I have started making quilts for all the marines, and I will continue to do this for a very long time."

Life is good and when you give to others it is even better.


I have so much to do

Well, I have another busy day a  head of me. I really need to get out some paper and write everything down so that I do not forget it!

Anyway, Rusty went to the exchange yesterday and found a shirt for Amber to wear in that teachers class. On the front it says USMC and it has a big sword going through it. The back says when it absolutely, positively must be destroyed overnight. LOL The joys of living with a pissed of Marine.

Nikki and I had a heart to heart last night. It was nice to be able to sit down and talk to her with out someone yelling. I told Nikki that I did not want her to go out for cheer and I listed all of my reasons. I do think that she is getting in over her head. Nikki wants to do cheer, and student government, and she still wants to be involved with her youth group, and Nikki has some hard classes this year. I do think that she is biting off more then she can chew. As a mom I can see that, but she can not. Nikki and I did up ending go to the information meeting on cheer yesterday. However things came up that she was not expecting and I am hoping that it cause her to change her mind. Such things as, she would have to cut the visit to her grandmothers house short, so that she can go to cheer camp. I just so hope that Nikki chooses not to do cheer.

Amber is upset because she is not getting a lot of hours at work this week. From what Amber said the new guy got all of the hours. I told Amber not to worry about it because she has seen 10 people come and go from her work, so I am sure that she will get more hours next week after this guy does not want them any more.

The joy's of having teenagers!

Anyway, I should be getting by little fanny in gear and go do all of my running around. I have just have so much to get done.


Monday, April 16, 2007

please engage mouth before you speak


So I get a phone call from Amber this morning and she is so pissed off. I asked her what was going on.

One of her teacher was talking about the war, and the teacher was asked that if he was drafted if he would go. The teacher said no that he would move his family to Canada.

What? That was all I could say to Amber. Amber goes on to tell me that her and this Navy brat were very hurt by his comment. I hung up with Amber.

I called the school and asked if I could speak to this teacher. Lucky for me it was his free period.

here is that conversation:

Teacher: this Mr. C

Me: hello this Kelli Nelson, I am Amber Nelson's mom. I am married to Gunny nelson USMC Retired Permanent disabled veteran. I understand that you made a comment about going to Canada if you were drafted.

Teacher: I made that comment in jest and I thought I made that very clear.

Me: Well you did not. Do you realize that Amber is a Marine brat and that there is also a Navy brat in your class?


Me: You have the right to say anything that you want, however the military brats should also have the same right.

Teacher: I told the class that it would be very hard for me because we just had a child.

Me: Ambers dad left two months after she was born. Men do it all the time.

Teacher: I will speak to Amber and let her know that I was just kidding.

Me: thank you and remember my husband fought for your right to go to Canada and to say what ever you want.

This  "man" is a coward! That is all I can say about him.

I think tomorrow I am going to ask Amber to wear a USMC sweat shirt to school. Amber is not big into that sort of thing, but it will make the teacher feel very uncomfortable.

Any way. That was the start of my day, so lets hope the rest of it goes very well! LOL

Lynn, if you have a go Navy sweatshirt please send it our way! I will not allow this teacher to make our military brats feel uncomfortable.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

it's actually raining here!

Well we are finally getting some much needed rain! I am glad about that since my plants need a good drink.

However that means that we did not go shooting today, and that also means that I still have a car kit sitting in our hallway! Oh well, there is no sense in complaining.

Today has been a very lazy day around here, Amber and I started sorting and pricing some of the stuff for her yard sale, and all of the boys have just laid around and watched movies all day.

My goal for this week is to not stress over my house being completely trashed. There is nothing I can do about the car kit sitting in the hall way and there is nothing I can do about all of the yard sale stuff sitting in the dining room. Oh I know that it will drive me crazy because I will want to clean and will not be able to do that.

I am cold and I just feel damp. I think I should just go lay in bed and cover up with some nice warm blankets. It is a good day to do nothing.

Saturday, April 14, 2007

awesome day and warn out

Well here it is almost 8:30 at night and I am just now stopping! Today has been so awesome, but I am so worn out. So I put the kettle on, and I am going to make my favorite tea and sit here for a few.

Nikki went out and spoke to a group of men and asked them to sponsor her for her trip. They gave her $100! Then she called a lady that sponsored her last year and that lady gave her $100! I was very impressed that she made $200 today just by talking. Now if only I could get her to get paid every time she spoke!

Amber went up to this neighbor hood that was having a community yard sale and passed out a ton of flyers. The first house that she went to the lady tore the flyer up right in front of her! I told Amber to not let it get her down, and we continued to pass out flyers. Then the phone calls started coming in. We ended up making 7 trips just to pick up yard sale left overs! The garage and dining room are packed, so next weekend Amber will be having a yard sale!

Chris, one of the marines, asked Rusty and I to write a letter of recommendation for him. He want to volunteer with the young marines. I think that is just awesome! Chris is only 19, and he is already thinking of helping other people. I am so proud of him for taking a few weekends out of the month to help make a difference.

I am worn out, I want to take a bath and go to bed! Rusty just gave me a hug and told me that one day the children will look back and know all that I have done for them.

I will try to take some pictures of the quilts that I made. I just used big scraps of material and sewed them together, so they are nothing fancy, but at least the batting and the material did not go to waste.

I am going to go soak in a hot tub. I am just so proud of my children!

Friday, April 13, 2007

a quilting day

Today I managed to get four good size pet quilts done. I still have enough batting to make a few smaller ones, so I will try to work on them in the morning.

I must say that today was very slow and nice. I got to spend most of the day quilting. Then I went to watch a little t.v. and woke up with Nikki taking a nap next to me. I just love it when my children come and cuddle with me.

Today I made up some charts for the girls. I broke the chart down into $20 a person. This really helped the girls to not look at the big picture, but look at how easy it will be for them to raise the money. So now I have two charts and the cabinet, with encouraging words on them.

For Christmas I got the new Kenny Rogers c.d. and there is a song on the c.d. that always make me stop and think. It talks about people who go out into the world and make a difference. I always think of the saying "be the change you expect to see in the world". So now what change would I like see? I know that I need to stop complaining about things and start changing things.

Anyway, my head feels like it is going to explode, so I am going to go take a bath and relax for the rest of the night.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Africa, Japan or Hawaii?

For some reason I cannot sleep tonight. I am so tired, but I turned out the lights my eyes just popped open.

Anyway, I talked to Nikki's mission trip leader tonight. We are getting everything set for the trip this year and the fund raisers are set up. So I asked where they are going next year. My answer was either Japan or Africa!

When I asked if Africa was an expensive trip she said yes, but it is getting more expensive every year. If they go to Africa then Nikki will be gone for two months over the summer!

If they go to Japan then Nikki will be gone for about two weeks next summer. Either way we need to start planning real soon for the trip next year.

Rusty and I had talked about taking the children to Hawaii next summer, but now all of our plans are on hold until further notice. We both agreed that going to Africa was an opportunity of a life time, and that Hawaii would always be there.

All I can really say is that I am so proud of her. I love Nikki's spirit for life and willing to go to place that other people won't go, and she does it all just to help other people.

I got no planting done today. I walked outside and the wind just cut right through me! Brrr, I came back in side and just did some work around here.

Tonight I made everyone's favorite dinner and I was very surprise to see that there were actually left overs! I just cooking dishes that I know everyone will enjoy.

My goal for the next few days is to use up all of my left over batting by making pet quilts to take down to the base animal shelter. I do not understand some of the people in the military. They will spend a ton of money to buy these fancy dogs and then they will dump them if they move. I do understand if they are going over seas, but come on people. If I spent $500 on a dog, I would be taking that dog with me across the country! Anyway....... I am off my soap box.

I would like to say a big thank you to everyone out there who has been reading and commenting in my journal. I had no idea that I was on a list! Who knew that my life would be interesting? Thanks everyone.

I guess I am going to go do something productive but yet quiet since everyone else in the house is sleep.

One more thing. Gerry I would be honored if you would be my fill in mom. I try my best to do the right things for our children, but sometimes I still need advice. Sometimes I just want and need some positive affirmation that I am on the right track.

Good night everyone.

up early

I cannot believe that I got out of the bed at 6 a.m.! Yes, I am very spoiled and Rusty just allows me to sleep in until I am done sleeping. That is usually around the crack of 9 a.m.

Anyway, today is suppose to be nice again, so I think I am going to go buy some strawberry plants. One of my Aunts use to grow them and I remember how sweet they were. My life as a house wife can be rather dull at times!

Last night Rusty brought home pizza for dinner, and I was pleased because that meant that I did not have to cook! There must have been something in that pizza, because I was the one who felt like they were on viagra! LOL o.k. I will stop there. Oh just a thought I better not eat that pizza for breakfast.

I forgot to ask Rusty to pick Nikki up some clairton, so when I called him to ask him to go to the exchange and get it he said that he would not be on base today. Damn it. Now I have to go to wal mart and fill out the forms just to get claritin! I swear they want a blood sample, but on base we can still buy it over the counter. Maybe I will ask on of the marines to pick it up?

Rusty said that we can go shoot skeet and trap on Sunday, so I am so looking forward to that! I will be able to add that to my list of new things for the year. Rusty did say that he needed to get out the shot guns and clean them. I just looked at him. Cleaning the weapons is a guy job, I just fire them.

I do hope that everyone out there has an awesome day. I would like to say hello to Andy. Andy left me his first comment yesterday. so if there are more lurkers out there please make yourself known!

Wednesday, April 11, 2007


When we moved into this house there was a huge honeysuckle bush right out side the front door. A few years ago we had to rip it out because to much of it was dead. A few months ago Rusty said that he missed the smell.

So I went and bought some Jasmine bushes. They smell so good! One day when Rusty came in the house he said that those bush just filled the air!

So I am on the hunt for good smelling and drought resistance plants. I have three rose bushes that need to bloom! I bet those will smell good. Today I planted this bush that has purple flowers on it and it smells so good. I just know once everything takes root our yard will smell so good.

Today I also planted two cherry tomatoes plants and a watermelon plant. I still need to get the sun flower seeds in the ground, but I am sure they will wait for another day.

I just love growing stuff. I think I am going to turn our whole front yard into a flower garden.

Today while I standing in line a gentlemen says to me "I love you dragon tattoo!" I looked down at my arm. Then the guy behind me says"I love your Celtic cross!" O.K. now someone is looking at my ass. I called Rusty and he just laughed. I guess I am going to get rub on tattoos more often!

I have had such a great day! I am going to take advantage of day's like these!

Liz sent me this video, so I am going to try to share it with everyone. O.K. that did not work, so clink on the link! LOL