Tuesday, November 21, 2006

family secret

I fell a sleep so early last night that I am now up real early! There is no work this week. I am kinda glad since my back hurts, but I am also kinda sad since we could use the extra money.

On to our family secret.

Years ago when my sister was getting married she asked my mom if she had any pictures of herself in a wedding dress. My mom said that she never got married in a wedding dress. I went to the closet and pulled down a big box of pictures and there in a frame was a picture of my mom in a wedding dress. My mom just took the picture and put it away.

Fast forward a few years. I asked my mom if I could borrow something of hers and she told me that the item was in her bottom drawer. I started looking in her bottom drawer and I did not see what I was looking for. I did however find a very nice blue clutch purse. So I opened it and there was a tele gram from a guy named Don Hann. The tele gram said congratulations on your wedding. I just filed that away as nothing.

Now it is 1990, and Amber is about 6 month old when I took her back to my parents house for her first Christmas. My sister and I were in our usual fight when I said " At least I know who my dad is!" I had opened a can of worms.

On that same trip home I was looking for something and I came across my sisters bumper book. My fathers parents gave all of us grand children a bumper book for our first Christmas. Nanna would write " Kelli's first Christmas 1970". Well in my sisters book it says " Loras first Christmas with us" and a year was written in.

For years my sister kinda knew that she had been adopted, but no one ever spoke of it. I told my sister where to find the information she was looking for.

My sister ended up meeting this Don Hann, and they had a nice visit. That was the end of that. My sister thought that she found her dad. Then she wanted more information and she asked my mom and dad to un seal her adoption records. They would not. Then my sister asked a judge to do it and he would not. So my sister thinks that my dad adopted her, Don Hann is the other father and that we share the same mom.

While I was going through a nasty custody battle I asked my mom if she had the same issues with Don. My mom said "Don is not your sisters father"

I have filed that information away and I know that one day I will share the information with my sister.

I think my mom stills try to makes everything right for my sister. My mom has always bailed my sister out, is raising my sisters hell child, and will bend over backwards just to please my sister.

I however am usually kicked to the curb.

I asked Rusty if he thinks my mom is coming out for Christmas because she wants to or is it because she is feeling guilty? Is my mom coming out because I confronted her when I went home when my dad sick? Rusty does not think it should matter. I think it should. I just want her to come out her because she actually wants to not because she is feeling guilty.

Anyway, My mom's mom did live with us for a while and she took the family secret to the grave. My dads mom took the secret to her grave. We were not allowed to spend any time with my moms family until we were much older. I had already had two children by the time I met my moms step mom, and yes she took the family secret to the grave with her.

There is no one left to tell my sister the truth. As mean as sounds I am glad that once I drop the bomb on her she will have to fight this battle on her own.


helmswondermom said...

I hope that when your mom comes out, no matter what her reason is, that you are able to have a nice time, especially your kids.  Hope you're having a good week!

mrsm711 said...

Why won't your mom tell you all who the father is?  Whats the big deal?  This is the millenium.  It happens, but it would be nice to know for alot of reasons.  Hope someday you find out.  :)

cgtperkins said...

Im sure your mom wants to come out for Christmas. I also hope you guys find out who the father is!!

seraphoflove9001 said...

I'm on your side with this one! She needs to fess up. Because your sister needs to know becuse of medical reasons and all other kinds of things. And it does sound like a guilt thing that your mom is coming for Christmas. Just my opinion...because I've been in your shoes with this one. And still am. And I still have unanswered questioned that should have been answered before certain memebers of my family died. Now I'll never know. And I need to know for me and my childrens sake. I do hope thins do work out and she comes clean. Because I'm going through so much pain and so are my children because I have no idea of a lot of things. Good luck hon.